I Choose to be a Mormon!

With all of the publicity in the media of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints, also known as the "Mormons" or the "LDS Church" I think it is high time I do a post that I have wanted to do for  along time...so here goes...





I admit that it kind of saddens me that members of the LDS faith and the LDS church in general are often not considered "Christian". It boggles my mind! To reference a beloved scripture from the Book of Mormon which is found in 2 Nephi 25:26 And we talk of Christ, we rejoice in Christ, we preach of Christ, we prophesy of Christ, and we write according to our prophecies, that our children may know to what source they may look for a remission of their sins.

Not a day goes by that our family doesn't discuss our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ! We pray in His name, we teach our children in His name. We look for the beauty around us and praise His name! Daily...hourly! We look for ways to bring His name into the praisings we speak, ever so humbly, respectfully, for we have nothing...we are nothing without Him!

I hope if this blog does nothing more in my life but to leave a legacy for my children that they know without a shadow of a doubt that I KNOW that my Redeemer lives! That He is our Savior and that because of Him we shall have eternal life! I have felt His comforting spirit, the sweet whisperings of my personal worth to Him. I hope that someday, if we should be tried on the "crime" of being Christian, my life, my actions, my words and deeds and testimony shall convict me! For if it cannot be found that enough evidence exists in my life to find me "guilty of being Christian", then I have failed myself and my family! I know that Jesus Christ was born of Mary, a virgin girl, and that He lived a perfect life, setting a perfect example for us to follow. He then gave His life, having atoned for the sins, and sorrows and emptiness, pains and trials that we would all feel. He LOVES us! He loves every single one of us! No exceptions! He wants us all with Him! He was resurrected to assure us that same honor someday! He lives now! He watches for us, watches over us and he cheers us on! We can do this...we must do this...He did it for us already and we only need to endure to the end.

I know many people who have questions about our religion, some of these questions seem unfair, even judgemental and I say to ask someone who has a testimony of this gospel.So many anti-mormon websites exist, but if you want to know if it IS true, then read the Book of Mormon, open your mind to something that may seem far out (after all, was Jesus not born of a virgin? Was He not resurrected?) and allow the Spirit to speak to your soul. Learn what we believe, then decide for yourself. Then, as in Moroni 10:4 And when ye shall receive these things, I would exhort you that ye would ask God, the Eternal Father, in the name of Christ, if these things are not true; and if ye shall ask with a sincere heart, with real intent, having faith in Christ, he will manifest the truth of it unto you, by the power of the Holy Ghost. If it is true, then the Spirit will fill you with a sweetness you cannot describe! Go to the people who live the religion, go to the websites sponsored by our religion, read the scriptures we believe in - both the Book of Mormon & the Bible!, ask the missionaries who give up years of their lives - paying their own way- to serve and teach what they know to be true!

Above all, give respect, but even if you don't I will for you. For some reason, our religious undergarments come up a lot in discussing our religion. They are not secret, they are sacred to us. I described it this way to someone who asked very respectfully about them. "The intimacies of a marriage are not shared openly with others, we know intimacy occurs in a marriage - it's not a secret, but yet we don't share our intimate experiences with everyone, because it is sacred, shared between the husband and wife." This is not LDS exclusive, it goes across the board, to all people. Intimacy is sacred. Our under garments are very much the same, sacred not secret. One day as I was taking our children - all 5 of them - to do errands, a woman dressed in her religious Islamic clothing passed by us. Two of our children, ages 4 and 5, asked me why she dressed that way. I very simply explained to her that her clothing was like our garments, a religious expression of her promises to whomever she believed in. The children nodded in understanding and on we went. If little children can get it, then adults should as well! It's about respect and honor and love for mankind, not just religion. In our Articles of Faith, number 11 it says: We claim the ^aprivilege of worshiping Almighty God according to the ^bdictates of our own ^cconscience, and allow all men the same privilege, let them ^dworship how, where, or what they may.

I choose to worship Jesus Christ! I choose to be a Mormon!

Here's a link to some great information here.
 

They are a gift for Spencer...

There are days when I question my parenting. Every good parent wonders if what they are doing is right. Every good parent questions, at times, whether or not they CAN do this job. Truthfully, this is a daily occurrence for me. And when you have 5 children, it seems as if it is a multiple times per day thought. When I am trying to make dinner, and the toddler - who is outgrowing his nap is hanging on my legs, screaming because he is tired, and the baby who was awakened from her nap too early and she is screaming because she wants me to hold her while I make dinner, and one or more of the school aged children is needing help with homework, while the other one is needing me to listen to them read and the other one is lying on the floor in his room having a tantrum because he doesn't want to to do his homework, I think about this thought. The pot on the stove is boiling potato water over onto the burners, the reheat-able container has exploded corn all over the inside of the microwave, the table needs to be set, the phone is ringing and dinner is either burned or running twenty minutes behind.

I'm sure this sounds familiar to most parents.

What adds a little bit to my questioning my parenting, is the reason the eleven year old - going on twelve - mind you, is having a tantrum on the floor in his room. Spencer has a form of high functioning autism. I've discussed this before. He is incredibly intelligent in science. And even when you think he isn't listening, he can often repeat back to you everything that was discussed or read. We are finding that he has an amazing grasp and retention of the scriptures. We hope it will someday develop into a testimony. The issue, more than any other is that Spencer does not "get" feelings. He knows he has feelings. And he certainly doesn't like it when other people hurt his feelings or don't go along with his desires. Like all children, he doesn't want to do what he doesn't want to do. Unlike other nearly twelve year olds, he has no problem with throwing himself on the floor and having a fist pounding tantrum. He is not opposed to anyone seeing his behavior because, although other kids his age are still pouting and slamming doors, they are not usually going to do it in front of peers. They are recognizing that the world does  not revolve around them. Spencer doesn't care. The world is about him and everyone should go along with that. It's just part of asperger syndrome.

Maybe you have seen a show called "The Big Bang Theory"?

To be honest, it has some questionable material at times. They are a group of incredibly intelligent - multiple doctorate degrees, phd's, etc.- late twenties - single friends, whose minds are focused on two things - all things intelligent, and often "nerdy" and people of the opposite sex. So they spend some time discussing adult topics pertaining to, but not necessarily respecting that which most of us honor in an intimate relationship with our spouse :) Anyway, one of the characters, Sheldon is so much like Spencer. I swear he has asperger syndrome, although it is not mentioned. But his character is rigid in routine, opinionated and self-centered in a way that a lot of people with asperger's also are. John and I laugh and laugh at his antics because he is Spencer in about 15 years! I only hope Spencer succeeds as well as Sheldon has - career speaking, and couple that with the encouragement and training to learn to be socially appropriate, where Sheldon is not. It seems a far out dream.

Recently Spencer and his great friend Ozzy (right there, a blessing that so many kids with this disorder don't often have) had a little tiff involving sharing. Spencer didn't share and Ozzy let it go, but then when Ozzy didn't give Spencer what he wanted (because he wanted Spencer to understand how he felt, and I wish it would work!), a minor fight broke out. Spencer wouldn't speak to Ozzy and told him that he "wasn't going to put up with him". He then proceeded to play by himself in a classically autistic way, not noticing that his friend was even there. Ozzy's feelings were naturally hurt. He went to his mom, who explained that Spencer didn't understand some things like other kids do, and had him apologize for his part in the dispute. See what great neighbors we have?! They are compassionate and understanding when others would have thrown in the towel. When Ozzy's mom called me to explain what had happened, I took the time to talk to Spencer, who had come home and gone about his business as though nothing in the world was wrong. We asked Spencer if he cared about Ozzy's feelings, and he shrugged. We asked him if he knew that Ozzy had feelings and he said he "didn't know". Now, if you understand autism at all, and you know Spencer at all, you will know that this was not meant to be mean. He literally doesn't "get" that others outside of himself have feelings. It something that we work on a lot at home. It's something that he has classes to help him understand, at school. It's one of the socially backward/awkward parts of an autism spectrum disorder. After a couple of exercises to help him understand, and a discussion on how he really does care for his best friend, and how best friends are not, as my grandmother would put it "a dime a dozen", he and Ozzy were back enjoying each other's friendship and I hope a little bit more understanding of each other.

This brings my point full circle, I question my parenting...constantly... constantly! Every single day I wonder if I, and we, are doing what is right for our son...even more than our other children. I have even, in my darkest moments, questioned why in the world we were sent so many children! In the beginning, after we adopted Spencer and I had dealt with my emotional issues with infertility, I felt I understood Heavenly Father's plan. We could not have biological children because we were to raise this special little boy who needed our undivided attention...and then we were sent four more children very quickly, despite previous diagnosis-es and eventually, ironic as it seemed, birth control to counter the very opposite of what we had at first wished for.

At times I have laid my head on my arms and cried, wondering why...WHY?!, if he needs special, undivided attention and every opportunity he could possibly have, did he come to our home? Or, why did we have our other children who would only take away from the time we could give him, and from the other point of view, time that he would take from them as we devoted it to him? For years I have wondered this. And for years I have struggled with trying to divide my time between them. Time I have tried to make quality to make up for the quantity.



And then just a few weeks ago, as we had come out of a rough week of tantruming, I sat on our back porch putting shoes on one of our little ones as we were leaving to do some errands. The day was especially bright, warm and sunny for a March Utah day. It felt good to the soul to be out in the beauty. As I tied shoes, I asked Spencer to take one of the other little ones and please buckle him in the car. He scooped Jacob's hand up and said so sweetly, "Come on JJ, let's get you in the car!" That is all that was said. Nothing spectacular, nothing profound. But in that moment, Heavenly Father - in his infinite wisdom, took the time to whisper to my heart the words "They are a gift for Spencer." After all the years of wonder, I guess I had grown enough to understand. And I did. Finally. Nothing in this world could have been better for him than to NOT be an only child. His two sisters and two brothers are teaching him what we cannot through all the discussions, through all the lectures. Through all the SLP / social classes he takes at school, none of that better gives him the lessons he needs to recognize that others in this world have needs and feelings just like him. No one else can better teach him to share and be kind. No one else could better teach him how to love...and be loved...than his siblings. I knew that Heavenly Father knew what He was doing. He knew this part of this plan all along...and I finally began to understand. They are a gift for Spencer. And Spencer is a gift for them.